Today I acquired my Tennessee Driver's License. I am officially a Tennessean. This was not accomplished without some level of great difficulty.
I managed to procure my license after only 4 trips to the Bradley County office of the Tennessee Department of Safety Driver License Station. Upon my first trip I waited in line for 15 minutes to learn it wasn't really the line. This made me upset and I left. The second trip, I saw the line coming out the door into the parking lot, I stayed in my car.
Today was the third trip. I waited in line for 20 minutes. Correction, I waited for 20 minutes in the line that gives you a number so you can wait in a chair. When I arrived at the "information desk" to get my waiting number, I was asked what I wanted and after a quick parousal of the documents in my hand, I was told I did not have the proper documents.
Let me tell you the documents I brought in preparation for getting my license based on the information provided by the States website: previous state driver's license (Texas), Social Security card, current lease agreement, current utility bill, bank statement, paycheck stub, and current cable bill. I was told that in order to use some of those as identification I would need to bring a copy of my marriage license because my wife's name was also listed on some of them. She then said to come back with a passport or birth certificate and it should be okay. I left to retrieve those items.
Upon arriving for the 4th time, it dawned on me that perhaps I should have asked for a number so I wouldn't have wait to wait. After standing in line with the proper documentation and completed application for an additional 15 minutes, I was told they would not be issuing any more numbers out this afternoon. I want to tell you that I began thinking happy thoughts in my mind. I want to tell you that I began to pray for these public servants who have obviously had a difficult day. I want to tell you that I did those things, but I can't.
I WAS NEXT IN LINE. I wasn't leaving. Everyone else in the "waiting to wait" line left except for me and a Hispanic couple who may or may not have understood the bad news that had just been delivered to us. I kept waiting. A kind lady noticed that I had all of my documentation and the application already filled out. She helped me and said, if you don't mind waiting, I think we can squeeze you in. This woman was perhaps an angel sent to get her wings in exchange for helping disgruntled licensees. Eventually, I was given the vision test, paid the $19.50, and posed for perhaps the worst driver's license picture I have ever taken in my life.
Due to my beard and the exhausted look on my face the picture resembles a cross between the "inmate out on parole" or the "Jim Bob just come down from the mountain with his fancy go-to-meetin' shirt on".
A couple of other observations about my afternoon:
1) The birth certificate which was apparently the piéce de résistance (that's french) to my identity, was the hokiest document I brought. I mean it looked like it came off my 1985 dot matrix printer. This was the fail safe proof of my identity?
2) Since when is the driver's vision test negotiable? An elderly women was beside me getting her license for the first time. She didn't want to wear her glasses because then she would have to wear her glasses whenever she drives and they "make her look old". To which I replied (in my mind), "no your face makes you look old, the glasses make me feel safe". They allowed her to take the test without her glasses. The following is a paraphrased version of the conversation which ensued:
I managed to procure my license after only 4 trips to the Bradley County office of the Tennessee Department of Safety Driver License Station. Upon my first trip I waited in line for 15 minutes to learn it wasn't really the line. This made me upset and I left. The second trip, I saw the line coming out the door into the parking lot, I stayed in my car.
Today was the third trip. I waited in line for 20 minutes. Correction, I waited for 20 minutes in the line that gives you a number so you can wait in a chair. When I arrived at the "information desk" to get my waiting number, I was asked what I wanted and after a quick parousal of the documents in my hand, I was told I did not have the proper documents.
Let me tell you the documents I brought in preparation for getting my license based on the information provided by the States website: previous state driver's license (Texas), Social Security card, current lease agreement, current utility bill, bank statement, paycheck stub, and current cable bill. I was told that in order to use some of those as identification I would need to bring a copy of my marriage license because my wife's name was also listed on some of them. She then said to come back with a passport or birth certificate and it should be okay. I left to retrieve those items.
Upon arriving for the 4th time, it dawned on me that perhaps I should have asked for a number so I wouldn't have wait to wait. After standing in line with the proper documentation and completed application for an additional 15 minutes, I was told they would not be issuing any more numbers out this afternoon. I want to tell you that I began thinking happy thoughts in my mind. I want to tell you that I began to pray for these public servants who have obviously had a difficult day. I want to tell you that I did those things, but I can't.
I WAS NEXT IN LINE. I wasn't leaving. Everyone else in the "waiting to wait" line left except for me and a Hispanic couple who may or may not have understood the bad news that had just been delivered to us. I kept waiting. A kind lady noticed that I had all of my documentation and the application already filled out. She helped me and said, if you don't mind waiting, I think we can squeeze you in. This woman was perhaps an angel sent to get her wings in exchange for helping disgruntled licensees. Eventually, I was given the vision test, paid the $19.50, and posed for perhaps the worst driver's license picture I have ever taken in my life.
Due to my beard and the exhausted look on my face the picture resembles a cross between the "inmate out on parole" or the "Jim Bob just come down from the mountain with his fancy go-to-meetin' shirt on".
A couple of other observations about my afternoon:
1) The birth certificate which was apparently the piéce de résistance (that's french) to my identity, was the hokiest document I brought. I mean it looked like it came off my 1985 dot matrix printer. This was the fail safe proof of my identity?
2) Since when is the driver's vision test negotiable? An elderly women was beside me getting her license for the first time. She didn't want to wear her glasses because then she would have to wear her glasses whenever she drives and they "make her look old". To which I replied (in my mind), "no your face makes you look old, the glasses make me feel safe". They allowed her to take the test without her glasses. The following is a paraphrased version of the conversation which ensued:
"Please read line 6"No that's not good!
"I don't even see a line 6"
"How about line 4?"
"Uhhh...oh yeah line 4...uhhh...9 4 3 5...?"
"Can you see anymore of it?"
"I can't hardly see anything without my glasses."
"Can you try to read line 6, it's 2 below line 4?"
"Uhh...6 4 7 2?
"Did you say 2 or 8?"
"8? maybe?"
"okay that's good"
**On a brighter note, I was informed today that my good friend, Rollie Stewart, bought me a Dwight Schrute bobblehead for my new desk! Very nice.
7 comentarios:
It is good to see that you can find humor in a difficult situation. It is also a relief to know that God is watching out for us, because the department of motor vehicles certainly is not.
That is the funniest story I've read in a long time! Thanks for the laughs. I'm sorry they were at your expense.
I have to go to the DMV and get my license renewed as it was my birthday yesterday and it is now expired. This is the time they make me retake the tests instead of just ordering an updated one through the mail. Let's hope my experience is not near as good a story!
You need to post your drivers license picture. We got to see it.
I am with Nathan, that is the funniest story I have read in a long time.
Sounds quite similar to my most recent DPS visit to renew my license (last November). They also had the line to wait & get a number to sit in the chairs & continue waiting. I kid you not...I sat in those chairs & watched the entire Helen Keller movie...but it was on mute, so I had to just figure out what was going on. It was a great movie. Might've been better if I'd heard the words. (well, those of all the other characters since obviously Helen Keller didn't speak) Seriously, that was the LONGEST time I've ever sat at the DPS office & my DL picture is about like what you described.
I can remember going through a couple of similar experiences there in Clevegas. To my surprise, when I went to get my GA license in Savannah they gave me a number, the place was packed out, and 15-20 minutes later I walked out of there with my task completed. It was amazing! Efficiency is possible! However, it is still not likely.
the Helen Keller movie was on MUTE!!!! THAT is the funniest thing I may have ever read in my life!!!
Peter--I know! There was great irony in that! There were several of us in the group who were waiting that day who got a kick out of that.
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